imagine this: you are wandering around your local independent book store, hot caffeinated beverage of choice in hand, when you spot A Book. it has everything you're looking for -- a dark, moody cover; a $19.99 price tag; and, most immortantly, a blurb that reads "perfect for fan's of donna tartt's cult classic The Secret History (1992)". donna tartt's cult classic The Secret History (1992) is your favorite book, so naturally you shell out nineteen dollars and ninety-nine cents, shotgun the remains of your hot caffeinated beverage of choice, and head home to curl up in your immaculately curated reading nook and crack up open what will surely become your new favorite book. but then...no, it can't be...not again...!

BLECH!

(you think)

WHAT THE FUCK! THIS IS NOTHING LIKE MY FAVORITE BOOK, DONNA TARTT'S CULT CLASSIC THE SECRET HISTORY (1992)!

yeah. we've all been there. but be there no more -- on this poorly formatted webpage you will find my personal directory of that elusive genre known as "Dark Academia", helpfully subdivided into those that are actually good and those that suck major ass. (books that I have not yet read will be categorized based on my personal level of pessimism about their quality and are therefore subject to recategorization.) let's start with the good ones -- take it away, table!

TITLE: AUTHOR:
"Once Upon a Time at Bennington College" Lili Anolik
Posession A.S. Byatt
The Name of the Rose Umberto Eco
The Magus John Fowles
The Likeness Tana French
The Secret Place Tana French
The Line of Beauty Alan Hollinghurst
The Orchard David Hopen
Hangsaman Shirley Jackson
A Separate Peace John Knowles
The Gospel of Eve Rachel Mann
These Violent Delights Micah Nemerever
Brideshead Revisited Evelyn Waugh

alright, not so bad. now for the drivel: the rest of these are bad, or not at all like The Secret History, or bad and not at all like The Secret History.

TITLE: AUTHOR:
The Lessons Naomi Alderman
Dark Rooms Lili Anolik
Bunny Mona Awad
The World Cannot Give Tara Isabella Burton
The Divines Ellie Eaton
The Stranger Diaries Elly Griffiths
The Lake of Dead Languages Carol Goodman
The Most Dangerous Place on Earth Lindsey Lee Johnson
The Moth Diaries Rachel Klein
Babel RF Kuang
A Lesson in Vengeance Victoria Lee
The Furies Katie Lowe
The Swallows Lisa Lutz
People Like Us Dana Mele
The Maidens Alex Michaelides
Special Topics in Calamity Physics Marisha Pessl
If We Were Villains ML Rio
The Night Climbers Ivo Stourton
As I Descended Robin Talley
Catherine House Elisabeth Thomas
The Truants Kate Weinberg
The House at Midnight Lucie Whitehouse
Sleepwalking Meg Wolitzer
The Bellweather Revivals Benjamin Wood
Black Chalk Christopher Yates
We Wish You Luck Caroline Zancan